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Old May 16th, 2004, 01:13 AM
Jessica Simpson
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Default What do Americans look like and the Germans can Keep the Speedos

You want my advise on how not to look like an
American, just dress like the Germans, They
wear socks with sandals and Speedos.


Good Lord, you want to be mistaken for a German? Now THEY have a well-earned
reputation as the RUDEST tourists on the face of the earth. If a group of
kids is pushing to the front of the line, they are certainly German. If
someone is having a fit at some local, they are most highly likely to be
German.

Story: I was standing in line to check out at a hotel in St. Lucia, and a
skeletal fellow wearing slacks and a white dress shirt and holding his
cigarette like a harmonica marched past the line up to the counter and
shouts in his best "you-are-all-going-to-the-showers" German accent: "I
VANT MINE LUGGAGE UND I VANT IT NOOOOW!!!!"