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How do I avoid looking and acting American while traveling in Europe?



 
 
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  #21  
Old June 6th, 2004, 10:07 AM
tim
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Default How do I avoid looking and acting American while traveling in Europe?


"Peter File" wrote in message
...

10. Little Canadian flag lapel pin - Last resort, but I think the
Europeans would just assume I'm an American trying to fool them with a
little Canadian flag pin.


Lose some weight.
Try to remember that in Europe we don't have 30lb steaks for dinner.
Drive a car that is more economical then a 15 ton SUV that does around 10
gallons to the mile.
When entering a sports bar, never ask if thay can put on the baseball.


Surely he should be avoiding the sports bar in the first place.

What is a sports bar?

(Yes I do know, but only because I've been to CA)

tim


  #23  
Old June 6th, 2004, 10:26 AM
Welsh Witch
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Default How do I avoid looking and acting American while traveling in Europe?

On Sun, 06 Jun 2004 09:55:25 +0100, The Rifleman wrote:



nobby landowner.

2. No shouting or raised voices - Always speak at a level tone


Only in England or Finland.


Face facts the Welsh will ignore him, the Irish will try and con him and the
jocks will just try to borrow money off him ) whilst the English will
still call him a damn colonial.

***************************************
Oh dear \Rifleman you have got out of the wrong side today. Wahtever is
the matter can we hlp?:-)

  #24  
Old June 6th, 2004, 10:29 AM
JohnT
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Default How do I avoid looking and acting American while traveling in Europe?


"Mike O'sullivan" wrote in message
...

"Mean Mr Mustard" wrote in message
m...
Unfortunately, I drew the short straw and will be heading to Europe on
a business trip this summer. Now my primary concern is just making
sure I get through this trip and back to the US safely in one piece.
I figure this will be a challenging task with all the reports of
anti-American protests and assaults on American tourists.

That said I'm trying to compile a list of tactics that will prevent me
from being a target:

1. Never dress casual - I figure most Americans can be spotted a mile
away by something "wrong" with their wardrobe. Tailored English suit
should help keep me out of trouble.
2. No shouting or raised voices - Always speak at a level tone
3. Show no emotion - No laughing, no smiling, no signs of frustration
or desperation.
4. Do not leave the hotel except for business - When the business
meetings are over, head straight back to the hotel and stay there.
5. No American greetings - "Hey", "Hi", "Howdy" and "Yo" are banned.
6. No hand gestures when talking - especially no pointing
7. Walk upright; do not flail arms too wildly when walking.
8. "Bob's Your Uncle" - Rumor has it that this phrase will stop an on
coming mob of hooligans in their tracks but I haven't confirmed this?
9. Correct words - "petrol" instead of "gas" or "fag" instead of
"cigarrette"
10. Little Canadian flag lapel pin - Last resort, but I think the
Europeans would just assume I'm an American trying to fool them with a
little Canadian flag pin.


11. Lose 200 pounds
12. Eat green vegetables openly
13. Don't ask for the bathroom unless you actually need a bath.

14. Don't go into the Bank to complain when the ATM delivers local currency.
15. Order beer in McDonalds, NOT coffee.
16. Carry an umbrella at all time.
17. If you visit England, go into your nearest hostelry (pub) and shout "fill
the bar".

JohnT


  #27  
Old June 6th, 2004, 10:49 AM
congokid
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Posts: n/a
Default How do I avoid looking and acting American while traveling in Europe?

In message , Maria
writes
On Sun, 6 Jun 2004 10:48:49 +0200, "tim"
wrote:


(You know the joke about how to silence an Italian?)

Tie his hands behind his back?


Last night I was at a barbecue in Clapham with loads of Italians. Nearly
got swatted to death.

--
congokid
Good restaurants in London? Number one on Google
http://congokid.com
  #28  
Old June 6th, 2004, 10:56 AM
Hasta
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Posts: n/a
Default How do I avoid looking and acting American while traveling in Europe?

In article , macusr023
@yahoo.com says...
Unfortunately, I drew the short straw and will be heading to Europe on
a business trip this summer. Now my primary concern is just making
sure I get through this trip and back to the US safely in one piece.
I figure this will be a challenging task with all the reports of
anti-American protests and assaults on American tourists.


Funny :-)

Just come... You'll have no problem.
We are not american, you know :-))



  #29  
Old June 6th, 2004, 10:57 AM
pencil
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default How do I avoid looking and acting American while traveling in Europe?


"Mean Mr Mustard" wrote in message
m...
Unfortunately, I drew the short straw and will be heading to Europe

on
a business trip this summer. Now my primary concern is just making
sure I get through this trip and back to the US safely in one piece.
I figure this will be a challenging task with all the reports of
anti-American protests and assaults on American tourists.

That said I'm trying to compile a list of tactics that will prevent

me
from being a target:

1. Never dress casual - I figure most Americans can be spotted a

mile
away by something "wrong" with their wardrobe. Tailored English

suit
should help keep me out of trouble.
2. No shouting or raised voices - Always speak at a level tone
3. Show no emotion - No laughing, no smiling, no signs of

frustration
or desperation.
4. Do not leave the hotel except for business - When the business
meetings are over, head straight back to the hotel and stay there.
5. No American greetings - "Hey", "Hi", "Howdy" and "Yo" are

banned.
6. No hand gestures when talking - especially no pointing
7. Walk upright; do not flail arms too wildly when walking.
8. "Bob's Your Uncle" - Rumor has it that this phrase will stop an

on
coming mob of hooligans in their tracks but I haven't confirmed

this?
9. Correct words - "petrol" instead of "gas" or "fag" instead of
"cigarrette"
10. Little Canadian flag lapel pin - Last resort, but I think the
Europeans would just assume I'm an American trying to fool them with

a
little Canadian flag pin.

Any other suggestions?


Lose about 25 stones.


  #30  
Old June 6th, 2004, 11:04 AM
Maria
external usenet poster
 
Posts: n/a
Default How do I avoid looking and acting American while traveling in Europe?

On Sun, 6 Jun 2004 10:57:39 +0100, "pencil"
wrote:



Lose about 25 stones.



Unless he's going to be visiting a car boot.
I've never seen so much lipid tissue wobbling about in my life.
 




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