Is Your Baggage Holding You Back?

Here you are single again and ready to re-enter the big scary world of
dating, and like most everyone, you bring along "baggage". We all have
it; some more than others, however, now is the time to analyze the
necessity of that baggage in your new life. No one is exempt. You may
have childhood angst over paternal divorce, conflicts with friends and
family, or remorse over missteps and lost opportunities. Everyone has
a history and an emotional response to it. What matters, when it comes
to being a healthy, thriving human being, is whether or not you have
deliberately unpacked your baggage.

As you delve into this new world, think about your life and the events
that put you back into the dating world. Maybe it was divorce, a death
or the end of a relationship, all very traumatic events in our lives,
but if you are ready to move on with your life, you must put aside the
unnecessary "baggage". Deal with your grief from whatever situation
and prepare your mind and heart to accept love and happiness again.

Keep in mind that although someone might say to you "tell me what
happened", guess what? They really do not want to know your life
history, simple and to the point is enough information. People are
generally nice regardless of what you say and yes, it can keep the
conversation flowing, but keep in mind the more you say about the
"baggage", you are not creating any sympathy, but merely bringing
feelings back to the surface. If the wounds have not completely
healed, take steps to resolve the issues that cripple you emotionally
and move into a happy and emotionally well-balanced life.

This can be approached in various degrees. While we all have our own
way of dealing with our emotional baggage, sometimes it is more than
one can bear on their own. Seek out the counsel of your family, clergy
or a counselor to help you confront and deal with the issues that are
holding you back. By all means to do not sink into seclusion, come out
of the darkness, join a health club, take a yoga class and never
forget the power of prayer. Expose the issues; sometimes in order to
get beyond your past, you sometimes need to get into your past, what
went wrong, why did it happen, explore what you are feeling, is it
anger, resentment or just simply a broken heart?

We do not want to hear about your ex, how badly they treated you, ran
up your phone bill, and cleared out your bank account or the things
that were wrong with them. Know what this tells someone? You are not
over it, you are still angry and hurt and certainly "not

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