10 steps and $4 bucks

PaulDSmith wrote:
Please critique this article I just wrote... Thanks, PDS
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But the happiness this program created for the kids, their parents and
other backpackers has made this effort the most amazing travel story I
tell back home.

Big problem I had with the article was that it totally failed to evoke any
of this amazingness. It needs some anecdotes about the kids and about the
interactions with backpackers. And it needs some quotes from both of these
groups to bring it to life. Otherwise it seems flat and gives the impression
of having been written by someone in their basement in Chicago who is really
only theorizing that such a thing might work.

miguel
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Hundreds of travel photos from around the world: http://travel.u.nu/