Travelling with my 19mo old child

We are planning to spend a weekend in Santa Barbara, CA and I'm looking for
hotel reservations. The problem I'm having is that if I indicate 2 adults in
the search engines, I have lots of options, if I indicate 2 adults + 1
infant (2yrs), all hotels report that cannot accomodate number of guests.

I called one of these hotels and the guy said that if the hotel room has
only one
bed, he cannot reserve it for 3 people because of fire code regulations...
At home my daughter sleeps in her own crib, but she sleeps with us
occasionally (especially during weekends) and we have a queen bed.

So, how many of you have reserved a queen/king bedroom and have not included
your infant child in the reservation? Experiences?

Cheers

Padu